Think About It

Quote Search

469 quotes in
the system


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away. - George Carlin

I often warn people: "Somewhere along the way, some is going to tell you, 'There is no I in team.' What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity.'" - George Carlin

Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. - George Carlin

And although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager, I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen, when I realized the state had a legal right to execute me. - George Carlin

What if there were no hypothetical questions? - George Carlin

I think I am, therefore, I am... I think. - George Carlin

People who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point. - George Carlin

I had no shoes, and I felt sorry for myself until I met a man who had no feet. I took his shoes. Now I feel better. - George Carlin

My advice: just keep moving straight ahead. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. - George Carlin

There's a humorous side to every situation. The challenge is to find it. - George Carlin

When you're born into this world, you're given a ticket to the freak show. If you're born in America you get a front row seat. - George Carlin

Would a fly without wings be called a walk? - George Carlin

Don't just teach your children to read... Teach them to question what they read. Teach them to question everything. - George Carlin

Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did. - George Carlin

I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don't have as many people who believe it. - George Carlin

- more quotes -